The last few months of 2018 were full of distracting obstacles, busy life and less sleep than my body needs, (an ongoing issue). I had forgotten to do any self discovery, I had also forgotten to look after the me I had worked on the previous seven months. This was of course a mistake, I let that me slip away to the point of gaining some of the weight I made the effort to lose. I gave in to my tired voice telling me to get the energy from quick fixes like CAKE.
My username on Instagram is Poiema or pudding, which I liked for its alliteration. However I hadn't realised how much it kind of described the battling voices in my head. Poiema is the Greek word for workmanship or masterpiece. It is the term used to describe the work involved in making something beautiful. It represents the work that Christ is doing in my life. It kind of also describes the work that I am putting into turning the big blob of fat I am into something more healthy and feeling better.
I had forgotten that although I was not working on moulding the blob, Christ was still working on the masterpiece He saw in me. Although I didn't really feel like anything was happening, Christ was doing a work in me, I was just focussing on the wrong things. We are reassured of this in Philippians 1:6 'That he who began a good work in you will bring it to completion at the day of Jesus Christ.'
Quite often we can become so tuned out of what God is doing, that we dont realise what He is doing. I'm very thankful that God doesn't need our permission to carry on working in our lives. He cares enough to keep working on us, even when we are not noticing, not caring or even not wanting. In fact I wish I paid as much attention to making my body more usable as God does in making me a masterpiece.
I have given myself a wake up call and have slowly but steadily grabbed the reigns pulling myself back to where I was 5 months ago. So watch this space and I will try to keep you posted on the ups and downs of becoming a healthier, happier me. I will still bake, and experiment with food, but will eat it with control and moderation. Pudding in moderation. Wish me luck.
